Evaluating Your Associations

Evaluating Your Associations By Jim Rohn If you were to evaluate the major influences in your life that have shaped the kind of person you are, this has to be high on the list: the people and thoughts you choose to allow into your life. Mr. Shoaff gave me a very important warning in those early days that I would like to share with you.. He said, "Never underestimate the power of influence." Indeed, the influence of those around us is so powerful! Many times we don't even realize we're being strongly affected because influences generally develop over an extended period of time. Peer pressure is an especially powerful force because it is so subtle. If you're around people who spend all they make, chances are excellent that you'll spend all you make. If you are around people who go to more ball games than concerts, chances are excellent that you'll do the same thing. If you are around people who don't read, chances are excellent that you won't read. People can keep nudging us off course a little at a time until finally, we find ourselves asking, "How did I get here?" Those subtle influences need to be studied carefully if we really want our lives to turn out the way we've planned. With regard to this important point, let me give you three key questions to ask yourself. They may help you to make better analyses of your current associations. Here is the first question: "Who am I around?" Make a mental note of the people with whom you most often associate. You've got to evaluate everybody who is able to influence you in any way. The second question is: "What are these associations doing to me?" That's a major question to ask. What have they got me doing? What have they got me listening to? What have they got me reading? Where have they got me going? What do they have me thinking? How have they got me talking? How have they got me feeling? What have they got me saying? You've got to make a serious study of how others are influencing you, both negatively and positively. Here's a final question: "Is that okay?" Maybe everyone you associate with has been a positive, energizing influence. Then again, maybe there are some bad apples in the bunch. All I'm suggesting here is that you take a close and objective look. Everything is worth a second look, especially the power of influence. Both will take you somewhere, but only one will take you in the direction you need to go. It's easy to just dismiss the things that influence our lives. One man says, "I live here, but I don't think it matters. I'm around these people, but I don't think it hurts." I would take another look at that. Remember, everything matters! Sure, some things matter more than others, but everything amounts to something. You've got to keep checking to find out whether your associations are tipping the scales toward the positive or toward the negative. Ignorance is never the best policy. Finding out is the best policy. Perhaps you've heard the story of the little bird. He had his wing over his eye and he was crying. The owl said to the bird, "You are crying." "Yes," said the little bird, and he pulled his wing away from his eye. "Oh, I see," said the owl. "You're crying because the big bird pecked out your eye." And the little bird said, "No, I'm not crying because the big bird pecked out my eye. I'm crying because I let him." It's easy to let influence shape our lives, to let associations determine our direction, to let pressures overwhelm us, and to let tides take us. The big question is, are we letting ourselves become what we wish to become? Samthecoach

Success is Easy, so is Failure

Success is Easy, so is Failure Have you wondered what makes people successful? How about what makes them Fail? The answer is simple……the things that successful people find easy to do, others find it easy NOT to do. The first group find it easy to set goals that change their life. The Second not so easy. The first find it easy to read a book that will impact their life. The second not so easy. The First find it easy to attend classes and seminars. The second , not so Easy. Got the point. Success is all about doing the small things consistently that in themselves, don’t appear to be too significant, yet they give the Slight Edge to a successful life. In fact, the primary reason most people are not reaching their full potential can be summed up in one word: Neglect. It’s never about lack of money, books, opportunities or education. That’s all available. It is about Training one’s mind to have the mental toughness to do the easy things EVERY DAY. Think slight edge rather than Quantum Leap. Remember, easy to do and easy not to do the things that potentially life changing. Samthecoach.com

Leadership and management Tip.

“Bosses Need to Engage both side of the Brain” When bosses stick to the left brain, they can lack empathy and be closed off to new ideas. When they stick to the right, they can be neglectful of facts. The need to use both sides. One of the most captivating and enlightening TED talks so far is Jill Bolte Taylor’s Stroke of Insight, its popularity evident in the 10 million views it has accumulated since 2008. Taylor was a Neuroanatomist at Harvard, dedicated to studying the effects of the brain on people with mental illness. Then, one day, as she recounts in her presentation, she woke up with a brain disorder of her own: “I realised, ‘Oh my gosh! I’m having a stroke! I’m having a stroke!’ The next thing my brain says to me is, ‘Wow! This is so cool! How many brain scientists have the opportunity to study their own brain from the inside out!?’” A blood vessel had burst in the left side of her brain – the hemisphere of logic, analysis, detail and language. This meant that, for the duration of the stroke, Taylor’s left-brain had become dormant. It’s the part of the brain responsible for self-criticism, stress and anxiety, and so those negative emotions were temporarily suspended. Her right-brain was left to function on its own. And this induced incredible amounts of euphoria. A euphoria that taught her a lesson on how to live. Prior to the stroke, Taylor was an extreme intellectual, accustomed to always using the left side of her brain, rarely venturing into the right – the area that thinks visually, learns kinaesthetically, feels compassionately, and lives in the present moment. The stroke helped Taylor to discover the “nirvana” and happiness that comes from the right hemisphere. There’s a lesson in her experience, too, for business leaders. In his book, A Whole New Mind, bestselling author Daniel Pink writes that the nature of the world is changing to such a degree that power is being transferred from left-brainers to right-brainers. Where once we needed programmers, engineers and lawyers, today we need artists, inventors and designers. The world is moving away from the Information Age and towards the Conceptual Age, and with that transformation comes a need for different types of people to take charge. Pink suggests that even the most stubborn left-brainer is able to adapt via the following aptitudes: • Design: incorporating beauty and uniqueness in our work • Story: telling a compelling and influential narrative • Symphony: seeing and embracing the bigger picture • Empathy: understanding and caring about others • Play: having fun and creating joy • Meaning: working with purpose and fulfilment Still, there’s evidence to suggest that the left-brain versus right-brain thing is at best an oversimplification and, at worst, a myth. A study of the academic literature, published in The Academy of Management Review, found no reputable research to indicate that asymmetries exist between the two hemispheres – and especially not in how they materialise in the workplace. And in Psychology Today, Dr Christian Jarrett from the British Psychological Society writes that the left-brain versus right-brain perspective serves us better as a metaphor for behavioural preferences rather than an accurate representation of how the brain works. Whichever way you look at it, it’s true that some of us are more inclined to think rationally and sequentially – otherwise known as left-brained behaviour – whereas others lean towards imagination and sensory attributes, known as right-brained behaviour. Leaders have an imperative to embody both. When they stick to the left-brain, they can lack empathy, neglect to recognise employees, and be closed off to new ideas. When they stick to the right-brain, they can be neglectful of facts, impractical when formulating solutions, and unfocused. Either way, it’s difficult to watch the clip of Jill Bolte Taylor and be anything but convinced of the right-brain's superiority in engendering positivity and contentment. It’s what she refers to as “la la land” – and it’s very very tempting. By James Adonis

Key to a long Term Success

Consistent decisions are the key! I work with so many clients that feel overwhelmed and out of control. They believe the lie that if they just had more time, or if they managed their time better, that they would lose that feeling. The fact is that the feelings of overwhelm are rooted in a lack of clarity about what is best. Almost everyone has more to get done than time to get it done. And if you lack clarity on what is most important, then you will feel overwhelmed and indecisive, and will lack focus as you try to accomplish whatever you do choose to do. Another common myth is that we can multi-task. The truth is you can only do one thing at a time. You may be master at changing from one thing to another quickly and jumping from one task to another, but at any moment you are only doing one thing. So the key to losing the sense of overwhelm is determining what is most important to you, and this itself takes an investment of your time. Again, the feeling of overwhelm and fatigue hits the hardest when we are taking actions incongruent with our deepest values and beliefs. So how can you determine what is most important? Find a peaceful place, perhaps outside in the woods or by the ocean or lake, or even in your local park. Relax and breathe deeply, and use your imagination to project forward in time to a future event. See yourself riding in a fine automobile, and being dropped off at this event. See yourself walking into this large, formal room. Notice that all of your friends are there, and many of your most loyal business associates. And there are your family members as well, all gathered together for this event. You notice that their attention is directed to the front of the room, to a large rectangular container. It's a box, and you're in it! It's your funeral, and everyone that you care about is there. And they are taking turns, speaking about your life, and what you meant to them. Now answer this question: What do you want to hear them say about you? And what do you want the others in the room to be thinking about you? Write it down. The comments from your family, your business associates, your fellow church members, and your old and new friends. You are now gaining a true sense of what is most important to you. Here is the lesson. And it comes in the form of another question: Are you planning and choosing activities and projects that will create the comments and thoughts that you want to hear at that event? Now capture and review all of your to do's on a single list, and review them in light of what you have just learned. If you have followed my instructions, you are much better prepared to choose the priorities based on what is most important and valuable to you. This will be a great start. Your goal moving forward is to list all those items. Write them down. Take your time to think of EVERY TASK you need to do. This will help your mind to uncluttered. Now after you are done, do the above exercise again. Mark the tasks that you consciously decide they don't need to be done. After, prioritize the rest of the tasks and stick to it. If something new pops up in your mind, don't get distracted, instead just add it to the list. ActionCoach

Sales Tip: Do you Always Discount to get the sale?

Discounts VS Profits.... Which one counts more? Do you have (or have you ever had) one of those salespeople who thinks that giving a discount is the easiest, quickest way to make a sale? Of course, they may be right, but what about the profit (your profit) they’re giving away? If your product has a profit margin of 30% and your salespeople give a 10% discount to make the sale, you’re losing a massive, one-third (33.333%) of the available profit! During a seminar for the buyers of a large retail group with branches all over the country, an attendee shared the following tactic: “My job is easy. I just let the salesperson make a full sales presentation. I ask questions and listen to their explanations. When they’re finished, I simply say, ‘I’d like to place an order with you, but your prices are too high...’ and I then simply sit there and enjoy myself, because the once-confident salesperson suddenly doesn’t know what to do or say next. With much less conviction and enthusiasm, they may repeat the benefits and features of their products, but most of them get in to see me by giving me a lower price in the first place. Whatever new price is offered, I usually respond by saying, ‘You’ll have to do better than that!’ And more often than not, they do…in fact, do better than that! I get lower prices by just sitting there, enjoying the game!” The buyer isn’t stupid. But you don’t have to lose. If you are selling, or have others selling for you, you must protect your price and your margins. Teach your people not to hesitate or stutter when a buyer insists on a lower price. Start negotiating! Start using tactics to hold firm on your prices. Sell value…perceived and real Here’s Why: Do you think it’s possible to work 50% less and earn the same income from selling? You bet it is! Here’s how: Suppose your company sells pumps, with selling price of $10,000 per unit. Assume that your net cost per pump is $7,000. That means that the net profit on each pump would be $3,000. If ten pumps are sold at the full price, the net profit for your company will be $30,000. Compare this with again selling ten pumps, but this time at a discount of ten percent. The total selling price for ten pumps is then $90,000. The net cost for ten pumps remains at $70,000. The net profit has decreased to only $20,000 compared to the original transaction $30,000 where no discount was given. If your company continued to sell at ten percent discount, then you’d have to sell 15 pumps to achieve a net profit of $30,000. Here’s how it looks: Sales Discount Gross Sales Net cost Profit 10 0% $100,000 $70,000 $30,000 10 10% $90,000 $70,000 $20,000 15 10% $135,000 $105,000 $30,000 What are the lessons to be learned from this example? A ten percent discount means your company must sell 50% more units (15 instead of 10) to earn the same profit dollars. A ten percent discount means someone has to work 50% harder to earn the company the same dollars. By not giving discounts, in essence the company can “work” 50% less and earn the same income. In spite of this, you might still think, “But, if I don’t give discounts, I’ll lose sales! It’s an industry norm to give them...everyone does. If I don’t give discounts, they’ll go to the competition!” And you may be right, of course. You may lose a few deals if you don’t give discounts…but the good news is you can afford to…and still make the same or more profit. ActionCoach

Two maybe Three's Company

As a small business owner marketing can be hard work and expensive. Whether you are going down the networking route, doing presentations, or marketing yourself through more traditional methods, such as adverts, it takes time and money to do it right. However, there are ways to reduce the costs, and the time you have to spend. By teaming up with other business owners you can share the marketing time and expense. An obvious collusion is to put together a presentation with a couple of likeminded businesses in complementary fields. For example, an employment lawyer could run a seminar with an HR expert and a payroll company. The costs of the venue, refreshments, seminar marketing, handouts etc. could then be shared three ways. As an individual you also only have to prepare enough material for a third of the presentation time – thus saving you time and effort. There are also hidden benefits of doing joint presentations. Each professional will get a better understanding of the others’ fields. This will make it easier for them to refer their clients in areas they are not, themselves, familiar. Another way of colluding is having a common website, blog, or other social media presence. I am currently involved in helping put together a fantastic website to introduce business owners to management accountants in their area. The benefit of such a scheme is that we can create a really great website, which is inexpensive for each accountant, because of the numbers of people who will be advertised on it. So, why not have a think about which of your business contacts you can do a joint piece of marketing with and see where it takes you. By F. Bevan

Life Would Be Easy... If It Weren't for DIFFICULT People

by Connie Podesta Go on, it's okay. Admit it! We all know that life would be a whole lot easier if we didn't have to deal with those few (or many) difficult people we just can't seem to avoid. I think you know who I'm talking about. What's not okay is to give up something you need, want or deserve because of their rude, obnoxious, sullen, and apathetic habits. Yes, I do mean "habits". If you're tired of playing their game, take charge of your life by taking a good look at yourself! You cannot change them, but you can change what you do and how you act around them - and ultimately how they affect your life. The Good News... and the Bad News Difficult people have been trained and taught to act the way they do since they were children. In fact, they have been rewarded for their negative behavior throughout their entire lives. Difficult behavior worked for them as children - and more important, it continues to work for them as adults. I believe that most of us are born with the capacity and desire to love and be loved. As we grow, we learn to respond to verbal and visual cues and we begin to adjust our behavior to obtain the positive responses we want. Children who can manipulate their parents soon learn to enjoy feelings of power and control over others. The game of life is basically about "getting our needs met." And you certainly do play a part! We reward difficult people by giving in to their needs. Think about it. If someone's behavior is consistently inappropriate or unacceptable toward you, ask yourself if in any way you are rewarding their negative behavior. For example, Helen gets upset every time Harry mentions that he wants to play golf. Rather than face a 2-hour lecture he usually finds it easier to just stay home. One day, however, he gets angry and accuses her of being a nag who never understands him. Instead of answering back, Helen gets her feelings hurt, stomps off and gives him the silent treatment. Harry takes advantage of her "cold shoulder" and plays a few holes of golf! Jennifer wins the same "reward" at her new school. Few of the kids would talk to her and some were even making fun of her. She asked to stay in during recess, but the teacher said no. Eventually she gets into a fight and pushes another girl down. The teacher tells Jennifer that fighting is against the rules and she will have to stay inside. What did Jennifer learn? Ask the teacher respectfully and you will not get what you want. Push someone and you can avoid recess! We have three choices each time we respond to another person: 1. Be positive; 2. Be negative; and 3. Avoid or ignore them. Difficult people see avoidance as a positive response. When we ignore unacceptable, inappropriate behavior, it will usually happen again because our avoidance tells the difficult person that we are willing to accept their behavior. What do they really want? Difficult people want to do their own thing, in their own time, in their own way, without interference. In addition, they expect everyone around them to cooperate - even work extra hard - to ensure that this happens. And they do not see anything unreasonable about these expectations. There is little in their experience to signal them that their actions are inappropriate. They also have little (if any) desire or motivation to change their habits. What can I do about it? We learn a lot from difficult people. We tolerate their behavior and attitudes as "part of life." We hold back our feelings and swallow our words. We make concessions even when we do not receive anything in return. We compromise even when it is 90/10 instead of 50/50. We may even question our own ability to relate and communicate with others reasoning that "Maybe it's me." Since we cannot change difficult people, we can only change ourselves and our reactions to their behavior. They need our cooperation and our permission to intimidate, control and repeatedly manipulate us to get their way. In most relationships, we are treated exactly the way we allow ourselves to be treated. The good news is that because we are partly responsible there is something we can do to create and maintain relationships where we are treated respectfully. That's great news! By focusing on ourselves and the changes we can make in our own behaviors and reactions, we can begin to take control of how other people treat us - today!